God has provided for me …..AGAIN.
My mind is going crazy: I feel like I have a billion things I want to share but I don’t know where to start.
….DANCE WITH ME!?
First of all, I want to thank everyone who has been praying for me over the last little while.
For about a month (In late Jan-Feb) I’ve been jobless. The hours at my old job became non-existent after the holidays due to….I don’t know really? During this time, I wasen’t able to insure my car and I have been baaaa-roke. I contemplated busking for money: playing my guitar and some songs on the streets, BUT as many of you know, I’ve done that before and I’ve come to realize that I can’t make anything substantial from it. I refused a few movie nights due to….no money. I’ve also refused various other things.
I was starting to enjoy this. I was getting to walk my “talk” out to see if I really was humble. It gave me a way to test out my integrity to see if I was thankful to God through it ALL. Not just the good times, but the bad, God still did provide for me and I saw it time and time again. I had to take a woman to the hospital using the company car and when I got there I realized….”poop. I have no money for parking”.
So here I am trying to remain calm and professional on the outside, but I’m really freaking out on the inside because:
A. This is not my car and I do not want the ORGANIZATION I am volunteering for to get a ticket.
B. I do not want to get a ticket in general because tickets= grossness.
I started volunteering at this Christian Organization out of pure faith…..
A few friends of mine suggested that maybe God wanted me to work as a councilor or therapist or drug councilor or something ….you get the point. I truly have a heart for people, and I realized this back in the days where I used to be a youth leader. I enjoyed every opportunity I got to just listen to somebody’s story and talk with them about God and Life. The place I volunteered in as a youth leader seemed to be filled with teenagers who were unhappy, there was “cutting”, promiscuity, gossip and many other things seemed to be a common thread among the girls. It got easy to notice who was depressed, probably because I had to come out of that in my own walk as well, but it just tore me up inside. I remember being down on my knees in my bedroom praying and crying out to God on behalf of these girls. I did not like seeing anyone in pain, and I still don’t.
At this new place where I was volunteering I was helping out for a few weeks without any pay. I was starting to get to know everyone there and I realized that the grown ups are really like young girls because of the pain they haven’t been able to deal with and process.
They are so precious to God and thus, they are so precious to me.
In the midst of all this, I was still struggling financially. Asking friends and parents for rides to university and trying to stay humble. I realized that even if God didn’t provide me with a job right away, He was providing for me through other people. Even though MY car was not on the road, others were, and they used their cars to help me out. That is so cool. God provided.
So today marks my first paycheck I got at this organization that I work for. I got hired 2 weeks ago when someone got fired. I was already a volunteer so they put me on night shifts…and man. God provides for his children. He is good. I want you all to remember that.
Life is not about the material things, because they fade away, but the things that last forever: Our relationship with God and others.
I’m so blessed that I get to work in a place where I can pray for the women I come across. I hear their stories and am inspired by how God can take any bad situation and turn it into something great. He is good.